Meowmere
| Meowmere | |
|---|---|
 | |
| Type | Weapon |
| Type | Sword |
| Level | 4 |
| Damage | 20-20 |
| Stats | Speed (+4); Weight (+2) |
| Location | Basement in Wizard's Tower |
The Meowmere is the valley's longest-running in-joke made solid. Offering an Ancient Doll to the lava pool at the bottom of the Mines produces a Far Away Stone, placing that stone on the pedestal in the Wizard's basement opens a portal, and a cat steps through to hand over a sword. It hits for exactly 20 every single swing, with four points of extra speed, and every monster killed with it bursts into rainbow sparkles. The numbers are modest and nobody carries it for the numbers. It is a trophy for following a secret chain that the game never explains, and the sparkles alone are worth the trip.
Location
The chain starts with an Ancient Doll. Artifact spots on the Mountain, in Cindersap Forest, at the Bus Stop and in Pelican Town can dig one up, Fishing Treasure Chests and Artifact Troves hold them, Jas, Leo or Vincent may give one at the Feast of the Winter Star, and a dog at full friendship will bring one home. Jas also sells one for a single Calico Egg at her Desert Festival stall, which is the cheapest route by a wide margin.
With the doll in hand, the farmer needs lava. The pool on the hundredth floor of the Mines works, and so does the Volcano Caldera on Ginger Island. The doll has to be used on the lava with the alternate action; simply dragging it out of the inventory does nothing. A Far Away Stone appears in exchange.
That stone then goes to the Wizard's Tower. The basement holds a plant pedestal, and placing the stone on it starts the cutscene that produces the sword.
The whole process can be repeated. A Far Away Stone sells for 500g through the Shipping Bin, which is more than an Ancient Doll fetches, so a farmer with spare dolls has a small and very silly income stream.
Stats
Twenty damage, flat, is unique. Every other sword in the game rolls inside a range, so the Meowmere is the only weapon whose output can be predicted exactly, swing after swing.
Four points of speed are the genuinely useful part. That matches the Bone Sword and the Steel Falchion, the quickest blades of the middle game, and on a sword this light the recovery between swings is barely noticeable.
Knockback is set a little below standard, so monsters stagger in place rather than being pushed clear. On a fast weapon that is not unwelcome: the target stays inside the arc and takes the next hit.
The ceiling is low and obvious. Anything above the fourth tier of weapons outclasses it, the Templar's Blade and Bone Sword included, so the Meowmere stops being a serious choice well before the lava floors it was fetched from.
Notes
The Forge can copy one weapon's appearance onto another, and the rainbow sparkle effect travels with the look. A fully forged Infinity Blade wearing the Meowmere's appearance kills Serpents in a shower of colour, which is the reason most players bother with the secret at all.
Everything about it is a nod to Terraria, where the same sword exists and where dropping a doll into lava is how a boss is summoned. The pedestal in the basement resembles a pylon from that game, and the cat is the delivery service.
Spending an Ancient Doll has a cost worth knowing. The doll is a museum donation and an option in the Children's Bundle on the remixed Bulletin Board, so the first one found is usually better given to the museum than thrown in the lava.
All Swords
Every entry in this group, with its key details.
| Name | Image | Type | Level | Damage |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Bone Sword | 
|
Sword | 5 | 20-30 |
| Claymore | 
|
Sword | 5 | 20-32 |
| Cutlass | 
|
Sword | 3 | 9-17 |
| Dark Sword | 
|
Sword | 9 | 30-45 |
| Dragontooth Cutlass | 
|
Sword | 13 | 75-90 |
| Dwarf Sword | 
|
Sword | 13 | 65-75 |
| Forest Sword | 
|
Sword | 3 | 8-18 |
| Galaxy Sword | 
|
Sword | 13 | 60-80 |
| Haley's Iron | 
|
Sword | 6 | 30-45 |
| Holy Blade | 
|
Sword | 7 | 20-27 |
| Infinity Blade | 
|
Sword | 17 | 80-100 |
| Insect Head | 
|
Sword | 6 | 20-30 |
| Iron Edge | 
|
Sword | 3 | 12-25 |
| Lava Katana | 
|
Sword | 10 | 55-64 |
| Leah's Whittler | 
|
Sword | 6 | 30-45 |
| Meowmere | 
|
Sword | 4 | 20-20 |
| Neptune's Glaive | 
|
Sword | 5 | 18-35 |
| Obsidian Edge | 
|
Sword | 6 | 30-45 |
| Ossified Blade | 
|
Sword | 6 | 26-42 |
| Pirate's Sword | 
|
Sword | 2 | 8-14 |
| Rapier | 
|
Sword | 4 | 15-25 |
| Rusty Sword | 
|
Sword | 1 | 2-5 |
| Silver Saber | 
|
Sword | 2 | 8-15 |
| Steel Falchion | 
|
Sword | 8 | 28-46 |
| Steel Smallsword | 
|
Sword | 1 | 4-8 |
| Tempered Broadsword | 
|
Sword | 7 | 29-44 |
| Templar's Blade | 
|
Sword | 5 | 22-29 |
| Wooden Blade | 
|
Sword | 1 | 3-7 |
| Yeti Tooth | 
|
Sword | 7 | 26-42 |